ex-internal monologue

dis-ease

April 1, 2014

Learn how you can reach them.
And from where trouble stems.
Open the doors to something more,
And show them what could be in store.

Then give your heart a shake.
Don't stop until it breaks.
Protect and give and share.
Don't hold back, if you dare.

Watch as your hope unfolds,
Give courage and be bold.
Pick your heart back up again,
Could be that it's on the mend.

Don't ask too many questions,
Don't beg them to believe,
Don't further their oppression,
Don't ask them not to leave.


old men gone, young man taken

March 26, 2014

some old men grow old
and great stories get told
of when they were young
and life's fun had begun
and how they lived well
with jokes ready to tell
and gave it their all
how they were good at 'ball
and what they would say here and now
we say rest in peace
and can have a calm ease
to know that their love was received
and though he is gone
his voice somehow goes on

but then sometimes instead
a young man is found dead
and his story was not set to end
tears come and grief flares
of the truth hard to bear
a lost brother, son, and friend
we consider our ties
and break down the lies
that we could have done something more
the loss here is great 
and feeling its weight
a wonder of what else is in store:
when again will we be this shaken?
who else will be taken?
you know if you've felt it before.





[an odd ramble]

watch out
you could lose it
just cool it
relax
be mindful
be simple
be careful
stick to facts

forget it
it's nothing
and wonder
instead

you're trying 
and wishing
you're being
your best

it can't be
it is, but
won't always
be
what is it
it's rare 
and life-giving
and free

a friend 
an ally
a truth
a light

it's worth it
it's giving 
a reason
to fight

watch for the whispers
listen for the signs
give up your hopes for
the truth you can find

she screamed

January 28, 2014

She screamed full of terror,
full of loss and void of hope.
She screamed like drowning
and without a sign of rope.
She screamed four times strong
and then sputtered a line.
She wanted vengeance and justice;
she wanted a life for a life.
Her screams were not deep
or strong, though few.
Her screams were weak
and tired and hurting through.
Her soul did then break,
her breath fell all too short.
I wonder what they'll put
on their police report:
"There's nothing to be done,
her eyes no longer cry.
Her only, newest wish is
that she could quickly die."
She lost her child today,
one simple, awful, concrete fact.
There's almost no chance
that she'll ever get them back.
A woman's heart gave up today.
I listened to her screams.
I heard the most awful sound,
in four long, haunting streams.
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