October 27, 2012

break

written April 23, 2012

Hearts break and you witness the sound of mourning
And morning with the dawn arrives when the sun shines hot
So your weak eyes hesitate to open so they don’t see
But they have seen and won’t close again in your mind’s eye 
It’s in the same way you cry for the loss of innocence
Almost to forget but also to recover a sense of feeling  
You broke wide open at the site of a haven
A shelter in their eyes, their hands, their arms. 
A place where rest isn’t questioned but welcomed and custom.
You learn in broken places that rest is a gift,
You learn in darkness how bright it is when light breaks. 

October 25, 2012

dream

written Oct 25/2012

A dream is a wish your heart makes
And, oh, does it ache,
And, oh, does it keep you awake,
A dream is a hope your mind creates
Something to which one’s very soul gravitates
But the world complicates
And the foolish wander from, forgetting what’s at stake
No, a dream is not only a dream
It is rooted in stories of need
It’s a vision for overcoming the norm of greed
It’s responding to the call to gather and feed
I dream pie-in-the-sky and I’m unrealistic
I am preoccupied with the caring of souls, not statistics
You might argue that it is na├»ve and I’m being simplistic
But I simply wish to dream.

October 11, 2012

'Next Door Ministries'

I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN THANKFUL TO HAVE GROWN UP IN A PHYSICALLY AND EMOTIONALLY SAFE HOME. MY NEEDS WERE MET, MY HEART WAS CHERISHED, MY INPUT VALUED AND IT IS WHERE I LEARNED WHAT LOVE IS.  

I HOPE TO ESTABLISH A HOME FOR YOUTH WHO ARE AGING-OUT OF THE CHILD WELFARE SYSTEM WHO HAVEN'T YET FELT ESTABLISHED, STILL NEEDING TOOLS TO VENTURE OUT AND REALIZE THEIR DREAMS. THE HOME WOULD BE TRANSITIONAL HOUSING FOR YOUTH 17-21.

IDEALLY, THIS BUILDING WOULD HAVE SEPARATE APARTMENTS WHERE SMALLER COMMUNITIES OF 2-3 YOUTH AND A NEXT DOOR COMMUNITY MEMBER* WOULD LIVE. COMMUNITY MEMBERS WOULD ACT AS AN OLDER SIBLING AND BE MENTORS/LEADERS TO THE YOUTH IN THEIR CARE. COMMUNITY MEMBERS WOULD NOT BE STAFF BUT WOULD HAVE A REDUCED RENT AND COMMIT TO SPENDING A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF TIME WITH YOUTH IN THEIR APARTMENT EACH WEEK. STAFF WOULD PROVIDE COUNSELLING, SPECIALIZED CARE/TREATMENT (EX. ART THERAPY) , EDUCATION, SUPERVISION, FOOD ORDERING/PREPARING AND ESTABLISH/MAINTAIN RELATIONSHIPS WITH DONORS AND PARTNERING ORGANIZATIONS.

THERE WOULD BE A COMMON SPACE WHERE EVERYONE COULD EAT TOGETHER. YOUTH AND COMMUNITY MEMBERS WOULD SHARE HOUSEHOLD RESPONSIBILITIES TO FOSTER OWNERSHIP FOR THE SPACE AND COMMUNITY IN WHICH THEY LIVE. THE HOME WOULD DO OUTINGS, SERVICE PROJECTS AND TAKE HOLIDAYS, JUST AS A FAMILY MIGHT.

AS PART OF THE TRANSITIONAL COMPONENT OF NEXT DOOR, YOUTH WOULD BE REQUIRED TO SET OUT PERSONAL, SOCIAL, AND EDUCATIONAL/PROFESSIONAL GOALS TO GUIDE THEIR TIME AT NEXT DOOR. YOUTH WOULD HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY, THROUGH VOLUNTEER TUTORS AND QUALIFIED TEACHERS, TO OBTAIN AND/OR COMPLETE THEIR SECONDARY SCHOOL EDUCATION/GED. NEXT DOOR MINISTRIES WOULD HOPE TO PARTNER WITH NEIGHBOURING ORGANIZATIONS FOR ASSISTANCE WITH COUNSELLING, LINKING TO COLLEGE AND UNIVERSITY PROGRAMS, EMPLOYMENT, AND SKILL-BUILDING.

AFTER LESS THAN TWO YEARS AT NEXT DOOR, YOUTH WILL HAVE TRANSITIONED INTO THE NEXT STEP OF THEIR CHOSEN FUTURE. A SAFE FOUNDATION WILL HAVE BEGUN TO BE BUILT AND THEY WILL ESTABLISH THEMSELVES IN THE REALITY OF HAVING A SUPPORTIVE COMMUNITY TO WALK WITH THEM THROUGH THE YEARS.

SOME OF THESE YOUTH WILL HAVE KNOWN THE FRONT DOOR OF MANY NEW LIVING SPACES, MOVING OFTEN AND KNOWING INSTABILITY IN THEIR FIRST SHORT YEARS. THE NAME 'NEXT DOOR' IS CHOSEN OUT OF A DESIRE TO BE A NEIGHBOURLY AND ACCESSIBLE COMMUNITY FOR YOUTH TO JOIN AND CALL THEIR OWN. WE'RE "JUST NEXT DOOR", AS IN, WE'RE RIGHT HERE FOR YOU. SINCE THE MODEL INCLUDES TRANSITIONAL PROGRAMMING, NEXT DOOR CAN BE A REFERENCE POINT FOR YOUTH AS THEY ENDEAVOUR TO REACH NEW HEIGHTS. 


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Isaiah 58:6-12

[Rather] is not this the fast that I have chosen: to loose the bonds of wickedness, to undo the bands of the yoke, to let the oppressed go free, and that you break every [enslaving] yoke? 

Is it not to divide your bread with the hungry and bring the homeless poor into your house—when you see the naked, that you cover him, and that you hide not yourself from [the needs of] your own flesh and blood? 


Then shall your light break forth like the morning, and your healing (your restoration and the power of a new life) shall spring forth speedily; your righteousness (your rightness, your justice, and your right relationship with God) shall go before you [conducting you to peace and prosperity], and the glory of the Lord shall be your rear guard.


Then you shall call, and the Lord will answer; you shall cry, and He will say, Here I am. If you take away from your midst yokes of oppression [wherever you find them], the finger pointed in scorn [toward the oppressed or the godly], and every form of false, harsh, unjust,and wicked speaking,


And if you pour out that with which you sustain your own life for the hungry and satisfy the need of the afflicted, then shall your light rise in darkness, and your obscurity and gloom become like the noonday.


And the Lord shall guide you continually and satisfy you in drought and in dry places and make strong your bones. And you shall be like a watered garden and like a spring of water whose waters fail not.

And your ancient ruins shall be rebuilt; you shall raise up the foundations of [buildings that have laid waste for] many generations; and you shall be called Repairer of the Breach, Restorer of Streets to Dwell In.

led out, led forth


written March 27/12


led out of the cold, out of the depth
the depth of lonely, the being bereft
the inside confusion, the steady facade
the beauty and grace covered in the odd

led out by a face, a narrow path to guide
the hope to run a good race, and not to hide
the truth of beautiful grace and the will to confide

‘for you shall go out in joy & be led forth in peace’
the truths gathered now will not one day cease
choose freedom and be delivered; know release

cry tears of forgiveness, cry tears of real joy
give wisdom and counsel, mind and heart to employ
store up the kind of treasures that moths would not destroy

hope

written Jan 24/12


she taught me about hope;
she warned me about it.
she said it would lead me and betray me,
she had seen its light and trusted it.
she had come a long way since then
she was stronger for it, and wiser

she would hope again, but not here
and not without reservation
and not without a good reason

truly she trusted the darkness more
and she was stumbling around happily in it
and she was surrounded by it

she ignored the source of hope’s light
she knew only the opposite
and then believed
she needed 
a better reason to hope

honest

written Nov. 14/2010


i fear pain. honest.

maybe it’s ‘cause i’m selfish
maybe i could call it self-preservation

‘cause it hurts too much 
and it urks too much
stuck in ideals of church too much
those needy, left in the lurch too much

maybe we could call it a pattern
maybe it comes from darker taverns

cause i’m sure enough 
that we’re deep enough
to know when enough’s enough
find truth by spreading light enough
on the wrong and those troubled
on the needs that grow and double

it’s doesn’t take a sleuth 
to know of confidence, youth 
to know loyalty like Ruth’s
that provides light and guiding Truth

for we give and hold back
we forgive but we lack
we lay down and attack
goods we stack
deeds we track

if we’re honest, we’re scared

October 9, 2012

observing rest

The Antithesis of Psalm 23
by Marcia K. Hornok

The clock is my dictator, I shall not rest.
It makes me lie down only when exhausted.
It leads me to deep depression. It hounds my soul.
It leads me in circles of frenzy for activity’s sake.
Even though I run frantically from task to task,
I will never get it done, 
For my “ideal” is with me.
Deadlines and my need for approval, they drive me.
They demand performance from me, 
beyond the limits of my schedule.
They annoint my head with migraines.
My in-basket overflows.
Surely fatigue and time pressure shall follow me all the days of my life,
And I will dwell in the bonds of frustration forever.


I am really bad at finding, choosing and valuing rest. I am learning what it is to truly rest and how resting is an act of obedience. In fact, right now I am enjoying some jazz in the middle of the week - just chillin'. This is not lazy; this is wise! 


“Jesus calls us to his rest, and meekness is His method. The meek man cares not at all who is greater than he, for he has long ago decided that the esteem of the world is not worth the effort.” - A.W. Tozer


Jesus says in Matthew 11:28+29 - "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy-laden and overburdened, and I will cause you to rest. [I will ease and relieve and refresh your souls.] Take My yoke upon you and learn of Me, for I am gentle (meek) and humble (lowly) in heart, and you will find rest (relief and ease and refreshment and recreation and blessed quiet) for your souls."


Soul-Level Relief. Deep Ease. Needed Refreshment. Recreation (fun!). Blessed Quiet. For my SOUL! 


"Japanese Version of Psalm 23"
(Composed by Toki Miyashina and broadcast by Rev. Eric Frost on 4th May 1965)


The Lord is my Pace-setter, I shall not rush;
He makes me stop and rest for quiet intervals.
He provides me with images of stillness,which restore my serenity;
He leads me in ways of efficiency through calmness of mind,
And His guidance is peace.
Even though I have a great many things to accomplish each day,
I will not fret, for His presence is here.
His timelessness, His all importance, will keep me in balance.
He prepares refreshment and renewal in the midst of my activity
By anointing my mind with His oils of tranquillity.
Surely harmony and effectiveness shall be the fruits of my hours,
For I shall walk in the peace of my Lord, and dwell in His house forever.